Wisdom

Great Things About Getting Your Wisdom Teeth Out:

1. BrightBoy brings you flowers wrapped in brown paper packaging tied up with string
2. You get to lay in bed all day and MotherCheer gives you a bell to ring so you can call for help with your snooty voice
3. JustTooCool brings you RedMango, the big size
4. You get to eat popsicles and ice cream when it's not even a designated treat day
5. People read to you for hours, just because your mouth is drooly
6. People tell you to get back in bed, even when you feel just fine
7. When you say things that you can't remember in the dentist office and ask repetitive questions, people still have to love you because you're so pathetically cute
8. You can eat an endless supply of mashed potatoes
9. Sleepovers

Terrible Things About Getting Your Wisdom Teeth Out:

1. Swallowing pills when you can barely open your mouth is especially hard for someone who can hardly swallow pills when their mouth is fully functioning
2. Throwing up because of Lortab
3. Trying to figure out when to take what pill, how many, at what time, and how many times a day
4. People tell you to get back in bed, even when you feel just fine
5. Stitches. And getting in trouble when you pull them out
6. Kissing like Pip
   
7. Coveting everyone else's real food while you're stuck eating the equivalent to some kid's Gerber leftovers